Detroit Woman Sexually Assaulted by… Satan?

I often wish that I was creative enough to write fiction. While I may not be a big fan of reading it too much, outside of some classic literature, I truly admire those who can craft a story completely out of their head.

With that said, there are often things you read about that are true, even though they just seem too ridiculous to be real. This is one of those stories (Click here).

A woman in Detroit claims she was sexually abused by the Lord of the Underworld himself, Mr. Satan. The best line in this news story is the first line that says, “The Michigan Supreme Court has agreed to review a sex assault case involving allegations against a local pastor, and the devil.” That means that some official Michigan lawyers and judges are going to actually have to consider these factors.


You Came Here to do What? (10/2007)

The fucking Devil? Come the fuck on man. A priest was the culprit – he was the one who sexually assaulted this woman. No one else. I highly doubt that if Satan, if he was indeed real, came up from his underground lair, it wouldn’t be to go to Detroit to fuck some churchgoer. I could understand if he wanted to go to 8-Mile and rap battle some MCs or something. But this? This is simply ridiculous.

And the people of Detroit are wasting their fine earned tax dollars on this. Justice is awesome.

Story source:

Author: bronsonfive

Film, movies, whatever.

8 thoughts on “Detroit Woman Sexually Assaulted by… Satan?”

  1. Hmm. Let’s sue Buddha. What for? He’s just too damn angry for my liking. I don’t like the way he treats little kids.

  2. this is too funny. love the drawings. i never see you on campus. must be all the pink shorts, rush shirts and green underwear that your hiding under. eventually we’ll graduate…

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