I’m not walking…

I finally finished up my Bachelor’s degree. I am 26 years old and I am now, finally, a college graduate. It’s not like I’ve been in college since high school (I took a few years off), but still. I am probably the oldest person in my graduating class. And, I am definitely one of the few who actually have a day job. Most of the kids in my class got support from mommy and daddy. So they wear pajamas to class, thinking it’s perfectly acceptable.

But I’ve ranted on those fucks many times before. There is a ceremony for my graduating class this coming Saturday. It’s like high school – you put on these caps and gowns and walk with your fellow alumnus. I don’t care about them though. People keep asking me, “Man, you graduated! What are you doing to celebrate?” Hmm. Waking up in the morning? I don’t know… what am I supposed to do?

I don’t understand what the big deal is with college graduation. You paid them to go there, you did your time, and you knew what the result would be. So, what’s the big fucking deal bitch? Send me a check in the mail, and I’ll walk. Pay for my entire schooling, and I’ll walk. Bring me a copy of Marked for Death on DVD and maybe I’ll walk. Maybe that’ll give some purpose for it all.


Can we skip this? (12/2007)

Author: bronsonfive

Film, movies, whatever.

11 thoughts on “I’m not walking…”

  1. My college graduation was the shit. Bill Cosby wore sweatpants to speak at our ceremony. It could’ve only been better if he handed out Jell-o pudding pops with our diplomas.

  2. Congrats kid! 26 yrs. old? That’s not old, fucking Sinbad was the entertainment at Gator Growl when I was rocking Gainesville. That’s fucking old son!

  3. I feel the same way. I could care less. It’s part of going to school. Eventually it happens to everyone. My dad calls it the $80,000 walk. If I ever finish my grad degree up, they actually want me to walk again. I don’t want to though.

  4. My university graduation was one of the most useless events of my life; I knew I got my “scroll of supremacy” as soon as I passed my fucking exams, so why did I have to do the whole song and dance, and shake the surprisingly soft hand of some old wrinkly dude?


    PS: “So, what’s the big fucking deal bitch?” I can’t explain it, but that line made me burst out laughing :-)

    PPS: I like the blue swirlies; I interpret them as representing the “lofty, on a pedestal, mightier than it is” degree/ceremony, and from your picture, you don’t seem very happy about it…

  5. Charls: If Bill Cosby rocked my show, I’d be there waiting in line already. With a pop.

    Mayor: Sinbad never fell out of the spotlight dude. Remember that.

    Trek: Fucking walking dude. Fight the power.

    Romi: Never has anyone understood the complexities of my masterful drawing techniques before. And I am glad it made you chuckle. That line came from the South Park movie actually. Best movie ever.

  6. I’ll be one of those kids, that mommy and daddy will be paying their whole entire college/life. Hoever, I’m not sure I want to jump right into college for a few reasons…So my question for you, is why did you take a few years off after highschool? was it money, and im being a whiney bitch even contemplating not going to college even though I know i can pay for it? Or was there something you thought was more imperative to do before college? Either way, I’m 110% sure I’m going, just not as physced as I thought i’d be to get to swim in a whole new group of people I hate for four years!

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