Pictures of Doom is Dead…

UPDATE: My picture days are over. Come to my new home by clicking right here. See you later.  

“Wait, what?”

Yes, the headline of this entry is true. City Pictures, aka Pictures of Doom, is about to die. By the time you finish reading this entry, you will realize there will be no more words ever to be posted here.

We had a good run. It’s been over 4 years since I started this. I’ve drawn hundreds of pictures, made fun of countless people, gained a ton of readers during the height of the site, and then lost them all during long hiatuses (is that even a word?) from yours truly.

“Why are you ending it dude?”

Simple, really. I really don’t want to be that guy who writes a few stories a month and then disappears. That is just crazy train. It gets peoples’ hopes up before smashing them in the face with the reality that nothing is coming for months. I often sit around and try to think of new stuff to write. Only I come up short. There just isn’t anything going on in my world that I feel hasn’t been tackled yet.

I still hate when dudes don’t shave their necks, loathe the Spiderman trilogy, laugh at people who smell, and dislike most movies I see. I barely write anymore because I know it’s something you’ve probably heard me say before. So why say it again.

I have made a lot of friends with a lot of bloggers here. I will still read their blogs (what else is there to read?) and show my support. But, as for this, I can’t muster up the originality to create new stuff. I haven’t been happy with the past few months worth of pictures I have drawn. Perhaps I need to learn Illustrator a little better? I actually feel that my pictures have downgraded in quality since this thing started and when I started it, it was for the purpose of improving my craft. There is a goal I didn’t really succeed in. I also feel my writing lately has just been done for the sake of getting it done. It hasn’t been that great.

I have been writing online for various people/places for a long time. I am tapped out of words I think. The archives will live on though. So feel free to search around and read things written long ago, during the Pictures of Doom prime (as I call it).

So I guess that is it. It was great to provide the 17 of you who read this frequently a bit of entertainment in your day. Your emails and comments have made me smile more than you will ever know. But it is time for me to move on to something else. Even if I have no idea yet what that will be.

I shall miss you all. Farewell, until next time.


Top Ten Films of 2008

“I don’t love her, she kicked me in the face!” – Val Kilmer as Madmartigan in Ron Howard’s Willow (1988).

There is no excuse as to why my absence here (and pretty much every website I’ve written for) has been so long without any word of return. So I will come back the only way I know how… by doing my favorite thing.


The Next One Will Be Better… (1/2009)

Summing up the year in cinema for the six people in my life (both in real life and internet life) that still know I exist, and even care about what I have to say about cinema. Especially now that the Oscar nominations are out. This goes out to you… even though we are so far into January now that no one will care.

“Willow, this is war, not agriculture.” – Val Kilmer as Madmartigan in Ron Howard’s Willow (1988)

I find myself putting together this list during a voluntary viewing of Willow on DVD. Not a good movie by any stretch but what humorless bastard out there doesn’t get a kick out of hearing Val Kilmer calling Warwick Davis (a fellow little person) a ‘peck’? Makes me smile every time.

Without further ado, and blabbering, I bring you this list. This list consists of my personal favorites of the year and to those of you who know me best, you may find it somewhat surprising.

Top Ten Best Films of 2008 Continue reading “Top Ten Films of 2008”

It’s a Bat-Man time, motherfuckers.

I’ve been a giant Batman fan since before I could remember but have been pretty disappointed with the way Hollywood treated him over the years. There was the schlock of the television program, starring Adam West, was as cheesy as they come. You know it, that show with the “Bam!” and “Splat!” shit written all over the place anytime there was a fight.

The late 80s brought Michael Keaton to the plate, to done the cape and cowl of Gotham’s vigilant superhero, with Tim Burton to direct. Danny Elfman provided the score and Jack Nicholson played The Joker. It was a pretty decent movie, considering most of the plot had nothing to do with the original story lines, but hey. Whatever. The best part though? The character of Harvey Dent was played by Billy Dee “Lando Calrissian” Williams, a non-white person. Made complete sense too, because even in the comics it was mildly obvious that Harvey Dent was in fact a non-Caucasian sort. He was a sense of optimism in Gotham’s mostly white populace. How can a city that metropolitan be that white? Two movies later, Williams was replaced by Tommy Lee Jones in Batman Forever, a giant piece of shit film if there ever was, only topped in awfulness by the next episode, Batman and Robin. Why make Harvey Dent a white guy again? I guess we’ll never know.

Batman was laid to rest for many, many years following. With a fuck-up like Batman and Robin, it would be a major challenge for anyone to bring Batman back to stature. I was kind of glad too – leave the Batman adventures to my mind. He was in a better place there.

Then Chris Nolan (of Memento fame) took on the challenge of directing a new Batman. The beginning of another franchise of Batman. With this news, I became excited. I loved all of his work because of the psychological nature of it all. That is what Batman needed – a psychological episode. I awaited this film rather excitedly… until I actually saw it. Batman Begins was far from being the piece of shit that the others were but it still didn’t get it right. They took one of the best bad guys ever – Scarecrow – and gave him the gloss-over. They tried to shove way too much into the film, ultimately ruining it’s chance for greatness. Instead of the psychological masterpiece I was waiting for my whole life, I instead got an unfocused film with too much of too little.

The things it did get right, however, it did so with great success. Christian Bale was a great Batman, Michael Caine was a fun Alfred, and Gary Oldman stole the show as Lt. Gordon. He is the best character in the film. But one could see where another movie may have ironed the flaws of the first out a little bit. It happened with X-Men. The first film was also an unfocused mess but X2 changed all of that and is no doubt one of the finest comic book movies ever. Then the third one came out and shit all over my dreams, but whatever.

So to say I was excited about The Dark Knight may be saying much. I wasn’t that pumped to see Batman fight The Joker again, even though the guy who is playing him just died. Even the trailer for this movie didn’t do anything for me. I went to watch it with the lowest of hopes.

…and the movie rocked my balls harder than anything in a long time. Sure, Heath Ledger is absolutely fucking amazing (I’d be happy to see him get a Nomination, and I’m not saying that simply because he is no more – this shit deserves it), but this movie is the Batman movie I was waiting for all of my life. It’s fucking angry, pissed off, miserable, emotional, corrupt, and so much more. Everything about it is perfect. And as many know, I usually hate comic movies (especially Spider-Man movies). But this movie is so much more than a comic movie. You owe it to yourself to see it.

Does this city ever turn this light off? (7/2008)

For Heath Ledger: Why not Britney Spears?

I am not a religious man. Nothing has happened in this life to lead me to believe there is some spiritual being out there, assisting our lives and what not. In fact, based on what I’ve experienced in life, there is nothing that’s happened that has even come close to making me think of something other than what is right here in front me.

And yesterday, with the passing of Heath Ledger, these feelings remain true. Ledger, a 28 year-old actor, was found dead in an apartment in New York City. He was never one of those annoying kids on the cover of every tabloid. He never got arrested for a DUI like so many other young celebrities. This kid was the shit.

Anytime you saw a movie with Heath Ledger in it, he stood out. If it was a bad movie (*cough A Knight’s Tale *cough), his greatness allowed you to forget its cheese. Even his brief role in Monster’s Ball, one of the most depressing movies ever, hit you in the gut like Alec Baldwin on coke.

And now he is gone, for no real reason. Yet Amy Whinehouse and Britney Spears live on. Lindsay Lohan will probably get another DUI, maybe even kill someone, while Ledger’s kid will grow up fatherless. We continue losing greats while being stuck with the leftovers of celebrity fame. Further proof that there simply is no justice in the world after all.

I raise a drink in Ledger’s honor, and even spill some for my homie Brad Renfro. You kids sleep well; maybe I’ll see you sooner or later.


The Last Joker (1/2008)